RATING: PG-13 ..language
SPOILERS: most of seasons 6
ARCHIVE: umm u can put it where ever jus tell me ok? thanx
DISCLAIMER: I dont in anyway shape or form own any of these
characters..but I jus use them for all of ur enjoyment:)
AUTHOR'S NOTES: this is my first ER fanfic...if written stories for
another type of web ring fanificy thingy ... so if this isn't that good I'm
sorry:) also I swear that if some1 already used this topic or story I
am sorry I have only really read fanfic from the lounge and ernfic
archives ..and I kno no1 used it there..so sorry in advance....also any
trauma stuff..im not that good at but I will try:)
SUMMARY: Carter is plagued by guilt and visions of a long gone friend.
" John....John..." Carter turned towards the voice that called to him.
He was in a field that was bright with sunshine and flowers. But he
could not find the person who was calling to him. As he continued to turn
the bright field started to grow dark and foggy. " John..im over
here...please come to me..." the calm voice beconed to him.
" i cant see you ..where are you?" he called. " Right here" He turned
around to find a small woman light haired woman in front of him. He
juast starred at the person in front of him for a moment. " Lucy....."he
finally managed to say. She just looked into his eyes a blank expression
on her face.
"Dr.Carter.....How could you let this happen?!" she screamed. Now
her pretty face was twisted with anger and pain. " How could you let die
like that? How come you NEVER listened to me? If you had I might still
be here...it's YOUR FAULT I'm DEAD!!!" By now Carter was shaking with
fear and guilt. He just stood there trembling and trying to tell her
something. "Lucy i'm sorry...." he managed to stutter. And then it was
He jerked awake, sitting up and breathing heavily. He was trembling but
he seemed unaware of it. He just kept replaying the nightmare in his
head. His fault...his fault.... Carter just sat there for a few minutes
taking deep slow breathes to calm him down. Finally once his heart
returned to a semi normal rate, he got out of bed to change pajamas. He had
woken up to them being soaking wet from him sweating so much. He knew
he had to change before he got a chill.
Once back in bed he pulled the covers up to his chin had looked at
the clock. It was 4:45..he was on in a little over an hour. He layed
back think of the dream again. Ever since the "incident" he either had
nightmares when he sleeped or he didn't sleep at all. He had talked to
someone about the nightmares and how he still had blamed himself over
Lucy's death. Over the last few weeks he had gradually started to forgive
himself. But tonight's dream had now set him back. He knew he would
never get back to sleep and got up and dressed. Ten minutes later he was
on his way to County.