Peter sat stunned at the counter of Doc Magoo's, contemplating the cold and resentful remarks of his girl friend. His mind ached from all the craziness of the ER and all he wanted was a sympatric ear. Instead his need was thrown back in his face. Somehow his intentions to keep the one thing constant in his life were somehow misconstrued as a break up or as some intentional act of indifference. 

Peter twirled the glass of water in his hands. How come the world seemed to mount obstacle after obstacle into one insurmountable challenge to be overcome at once? He loved his son and he would do anything for Reece. Nothing came between him and the necessity of being a father. Peter sighed and arched his back in an attempt to stretch stiff muscles. 

Today was hellish, full of cases that seemed to drop from the sky. He was surgeon trained in the art of human repair; he did not study medicine for almost a decade to over see incoming traumas without a chance to heal the injured. This was Romano's punishment, to slip the carrot in front of his nose and watch him follow it around to only have it snatched from underneath him. 

He was not a personnel director, or a traffic coordinator, that was Kerry's job. He sat unaccustomed to degrading thoughts, his mind filled with rejection. His skills were questioned when he was unable to handle the juggling act of arranging patients and matching them with proper needs. He did not have the bedside manner to control the child for a general examination. When he praised Cleo for help in a pedes case, he was practically chastised for his efforts. 

Cleo. Since when did things get so complicated with her? What did he do to her to receive such callous treatment? Peter sighed unwilling to let himself loath in self-pity. He scanned the dining area and noticed John Carter enter. The resident shuffled in slowly not looking at anyone in the room. He scanned one side of the dinner and found a vacant seat and occupied it.  

Peter watched the younger man place his hands on the table and begin to stare at them, lost in his own internal thoughts. The man looked unnerved about something and his mannerisms suggested that he was trying unsuccessfully to cope with some unknown stress or situation. His lips seemed to tremble and with shaky hands he retrieved a pack of cigarettes. 

Peter frowned as he watched John tap the pack against the table and pull out one of them. He placed it in his mouth, lit it, and drew in deeply as if the nicotine could squelch any of the demons taunting him now. Peter looked down at his own hands, he couldn't help Carter. What words could he speak that would heal the other man? It was obvious his people skills needed a lot of work and he was not in any mood to encourage others when his own self-doubt was eating away at him now. 

He ignored him, he had to. Peter did not get up to leave, because if he did that it would just attract attention. He definitely did not want the other doctor to think he didn't care, he simply couldn't right now. The surgeon felt trapped, but that dreaded feeling had been dogging him for a week now, he was used to it. Peter saw a familiar figure enter the dinner and saw Kerry Weaver searching for someone. She caught sight of Carter and went towards him. 

'Good, let Weaver, console him with whatever is wrong,' Peter thought. 

Xx 

John contemplated his fingers, such delicate instruments. They were trained to perform the most complicated procedures, they held babies, and commanded authority. However, too many times their owner was responsible for the deaths of innocent people. He fought so hard to overcome his injuries and he conquered his drug addiction, yet he was not able to heal. His morbid recollections were interrupted by a soft voice, 

"John?" 

Carter looked up and gestured for Kerry to sit down. Once she was settled and a waitress took down their order, he crushed his cigarette in the ashtray. 

"Sorry, my last habit," he said. as he extinguished the remains of his comfort. 

Kerry stared at him, but smiled when she spoke, "We all have little vices, I'm sure after time we all get over them." 

John knew there were no hidden motives in her words, but he could not help, but think they indeed camouflaged a deeper meaning. "I'm sure you're right," He replied softly. 

"So, is this my weekly stress review?" John asked in between a halfhearted laugh. 

Kerry grew serious; she did not want to put him on the defensive right now. "John, I just thought you might want to talk about..." 

"Kerry, I know you're just trying to be nice, but I talk to you and Mark once a week and I discuss things in AA meetings." Carter explained showing his uneasiness over the topic. 

"Do you really?" Kerry challenged, her voice not accusing, but prompting. 

John looked puzzled at first, his hands reaching for his pack of smokes, but they stopped short. "If you're going to ask if I have the support of my family, the answer is yes." John said evenly, his eyes on his hands again. 

Kerry did not back down, she did not want to be confrontational, but her friend needed to open up to someone. "I can't imagine the conversation you must had have with your grandmother about the shooting." 

John looked at her sharply, but he knew she was right. "I didn't tell my grandmother, she's a nervous wreck about by return as it is." He admitted. 

Kerry nodded her head, his admittance was a good step, but the implications were sad to hear. "Did you talk about it at all?" 

John fidgeted in his seat, "It was difficult," pause "I thought." John's eyes drifted away as the images repeated in his head. His voice grew soft, "The shooting reminded me about my vulnerability and it seemed like a horrible set back. I just got my confidence back and..." Carter's voice trailed off. 

"It was a horrible thing John, but..." 

Kerry couldn't seem to complete her thoughts when John spoke again, "Today was different, that kid had his whole life in front of him. I had no right to tell him about his medical status. His grandmother was over protective, she had no right to shelter him from something so vital, but it was not my decision to break her rules." John conceded.

"I intervened because of my own opinions and it killed him." Carter said void of emotion. 

"What about her girlfriend, didn't she have the right to know? Did Trent's grandmother have the right to govern the way she lived as well? What about anyone else either of them slept with?" 

John shook his head denying the perfect logic. "I was asking for trouble, I should have arranged for them to speak to a counselor first, or had one preset when I presented them the news." He played with his pack, toying with one of the cigarettes in his hands. 

Kerry placed her hand on top of John's keeping it still and trying somehow to lend him calmness and support. "It was a freak accident and that is a tragedy, but it is not your fault, John. You did the right thing and in the end probably saved more lives in the process. His girlfriend knows and will receive treatment now, thanks to your clear thinking." Kerry reassured him. 

"I guess, but Kerry when do I stop seeking the silver lining? When can I act as a doctor without questioning my ability or confidence?" John's brown eyes sought clarity, understanding in his friends'. 

Kerry squeezed his hand, rubbing her thumb slightly against his skin. It was comforting to feel and he let down his barrier. "You know it's hard to be honest about my feelings without thinking I'm being judged or examined. We used to be able to talk before, but..." 

"We can rebuild that again, John. As your boss, I have to be sure you are coping well, but as your friend I care about you. It would be difficult for any person to handle the amount of stress you have encountered these past few weeks, but you have. I'm proud of you." 

Kerry noticed how John seemed to check his watch and smiled, "Not yet, you have time for one more thing." Kerry turned to the waitress and ordered a huge hot fudged sundae much to Carter's excitement. "I think a chocolate fix is something that should be encouraged," 

John laughed out loud. He knew that had some double meaning, but he was comfortable with the joke. The atmosphere lightened up and both doctors dug into the ice cream. Carter out did himself my inhaling more than his half of the dessert and more than once he engaged in battle with Kerry's spoon. 

"John Carter, you don't fight fair," Kerry exclaimed when his spoon, clobbered hers sending ice cream over her face.  

Carter could not hide his grin when dripping ice cream tarnished the ever-professional Kerry Weaver. She found Carter's laugh contagious and let out several giggles. She glanced at the crowd to notice the brooding surgeon alone at his seat by the counter. 

"Looks like someone is still not having a good day," gesturing at Peter. 

John saw his former teacher sulking by an empty glass of water and recalled his crazy first day back. It was hard to return to work under the scrutiny of a boss, Carter mused. He looked up at Weaver, a twinkle in his eye, "I have a remedy for this." 

Xxx 

Peter sought out his escape from the confines of the dinner, but he could not tear himself from watching his co-workers discuss things. Peter felt like an eavesdropper, but Carter seemed very distraught over the conversation and even though he felt no indication to walk over and interrupt, he could not bring himself to leave if the conversation ended badly. 

He had been too busy to notice Carter, so Peter had no idea if anything horrific had happened to the younger doctor. The resident met with Greene and Weaver for stress check ups, but that was conducted in the privacy of an office, not out in public. The surgeon could not imagine anything more upsetting then the shooting that occurred in his absence. He sought Carter out on the phone when he heard it on the grape vine, but per usual, Peter had been assured he was dealing with it. 

Peter looked away in embarrassment when it seemed like Kerry needed to comfort the other doctor. 'That is something I definitely can not do,' he mused. Satisfied that someone who could connect with him was attending to Carter, Peter turned his thoughts back to his miserable day. When he thought it was safe to venture away when he heard his co-workers laughing and saw an ice cream sundae appear before his eyes. 

Slightly annoyed to have his private time interrupted, Peter looked up with his usual unpleasant manner. "What's this, Carter?" He asked the younger doctor who was peering down on him with a huge smile plastered on his face. 

"It many parts of the world, its called ice cream, Dr. Benton." Carter chuckled. 

"I know what it is. Why am I looking at it?" Peter complained. 

"So, you can eat it, would be my idea." John replied humorously. 

Peter sighed heavily; he was not in the frame in mind to deal with Carter when he was acting this way. "Thanks, but I don't want any," he replied grumpily. 

John continued to smile undaunted and placed the dessert in front of the surgeon and handed him a spoon. "Come on, Dr. Benton, everyone enjoys ice cream, I'll even help you eat it, " he offered. 

"You must have the fastest metabolism, Cater, you almost finished an entire one earlier." Peter groaned when he realized he admitted in watching his friend. 

"Oh really?" Carter asked. "Been watching me, Dr. Benton? Some might say you were concerned?" Carter could not resist egging his mentor on. 

"No one would suggest that, Carter." Peter stared at the sundae and admitted to himself it did seem tempting.  

Carter leaned on to the counter with his elbows, "I know you want some." 

Peter grabbed his spoon dramatically, "Fine, now you can go away." 

Carter laughed and shook his head. "You amaze me, Dr. Benton, but enjoy it. My treat." 

Peter watched John leave with Kerry in tow. He pondered the sundae and looked around to see if anyone was looking. Satisfied that there were not any spies he used the spoon as a shovel and dug in greedily. He smiled at the gesture that Carter had shown him. No pressure to talk, no comforting words, just a simple acknowledgement. The younger doctor knew him too well and that made the surgeon smile as he enjoyed the dessert. He retained a position at the hospital and his son remained in his care. Despite all the shit he had to put up with, the simple things in life made it seem a little bit better. 

"Thanks, Carter," he said under his breath. 

Xxx 

John walked Kerry to her car delighted that he was able to give someone else a simple act of kindness. His boss stood outside her car door and hesitated a minute, "I'm glad we were able to just talk, John, it means a lot that you trust me." 

John shrugged his shoulders, "I'm glad you came after me today, Dr. Weaver, I'm glad I opened up. I was going to speak with my sponsor, but I don't know where she went." 

Kerry smiled, "Perhaps she's helping someone else, maybe this was meant to happen." She replied. 

John nodded, "Perhaps. Good night, Dr. Weaver." The resident watched Kerry drive away and let his mind wonder, he didn't know what Abby was up to, but he was sure it had something to do with Luka Kovac. John blew out a breath, "Boy, he needs her more than I do," he said out loud at the thought what the Croatian had gone though the other night. 

Xxxxxxxxxxx 

 

Abby had entered Luka's hotel room with only concern for his well being. When she saw him alone and dejected she had only wanted to comfort him. The docks had wounded him that night and it was something that would be slow to heal. Passionate and sensitive men were like that, am admirable trait, but one that was a heavy burden to bear. 

She smoothed out his hair, as she held his head close to her chest. Abby felt his defeat, the literal collapse of emotions. She stroked his cheek and the brought their faces to each other. Two sets of eyes that longed for a connection, for the feeling of want and need. She brought her lips to his and they shared a gentle kiss. Suddenly their eyes met in a mixture of disbelief and desire. 

Luka pulled back, and waited. He saw Abby close her eyes, taking a deep breath as if she could not believe what was happening. 

"Luka..." Her grip intensified on his shoulders then she felt a quick dart of his tongue sending tingles down her spine. Leaning forward he kissed her again, she felt his breath hot on her face and let him in. His tongue explored her mouth and slipped in and out to kiss her. 

His eyes closed tightly, Luka felt her tongue lightly caress his bottom lip,

as she returned his passion double fold. He could not contain the urge any longer and toyed with the buttons of her blouse. Keeping slow to make sure this was the desired course of action; he was delighted when she reciprocated unfastening his own shirt, pulling it free of his pants. 

Abby gazed at Luka his face was flushed and vulnerable looking, that statementonly served to fuel her with the desire to complete him, if just for one night. She stared into his dark eyes and let her self get lost in them. Their lips meet again and with a swift motion he lifted her up and both of them retreated to the bed. Luka gently kissed her along her face as she peered above her. It was quite a turn on to see her over him, in a position of control. 

Abby ran her hands all over his chest, remembering what it was like to imagine what he looked like minus his shirt, his strong muscles hidden from view. Luka ran his hands up and down her back as she proceeded to run her tongue over the side of his neck beneath the shirt collar. She alternating between sucking and planting kisses, sending shivers down his spine. 

Luka being the ever gentlemen, paused, "Abby,...you don't have to do this...if" 

She placed her finger over his lips to silence him and returned the gesture by kissing it. He pulled her closer causing the bed to creak slightly causing them both to laugh. Luka placed his mouth along her collarbone, and licked the sensitive skin, eliciting a low moan from her. Her blouse remain unbutton which would just not do and he slipped it off her shoulders revealing a black, silky bra. She caressed his face and let her hands slip into his hair where she played with some of the loose strands. 

He carefully undid the clasp that was in front instead of the back, to reveal her ample breasts. They hung down, so soft and inviting. He took his finger and stroked one of her nipples that became heard to the touch. He smiled at her reaction loving the sensitivity the action had. He caressed her breasts and moved his mouth over the right one, the heat of his breath causing Abby to shiver.  

He sucked on it gently, the ease of which were helped by the fact that she remained above him. She shifted slightly resting her hips and feeling his hardness pressed against her. A smile spread across her face as Abby realized how much his body was excited by the situation. As he switched and started sucking on the left breast, he took one of his hands and started teasing the right one. Unable to control her passion, Abby fumbled with the buckle to his pants and quickly drew the zipper down. 

 

She slipped her hand inside and ran her own fingers along his boxers making him moan in pleasure. She teased the materiel breaking his concentration. He pulled back from her, closing his eyes tightly from the pleasure emanating from her touch. She withdrew her hand only to replace the stimulation by shifting her body up and down causing his erection to swell. 

"Oh, God, Abby stop teasing me," he begged. She obliged by helping to remove his pants and boxers ever so slowly, then pushing the rest to the floor using her foot.

"Take, your time next, why don't you," He teased in her ear at her deliberate actions. 

 

Knowing it was her turn, she let Luka trace her bare skin along her sides as he unbuttoned her pants and unable to control her anticipation she slide them off. Knowing that there was only one layer of clothing left separating them, Luka grabbed a hold of her waist and flipped her down so he was facing her. He nuzzled her neck, as he peeled her panties off. He pushed his weight upon her, and smiled as she squirmed a little, the action causing her to groan. 

Abby wanted to be a part of him so badly, the need to fill him with pleasure was overwhelming. She wanted to fill those sad eyes, with something else. Abby smiled when he slipped his finger within her, with such gentleness. He stroked her lightly arousing her to levels she thought forgotten. Being a doctor had its advantages as Luka's finger explored her depths, rubbing and teasing the most sensitive areas. Slowly he pushed his fingers inside her, dipping them in and out, causing her to gasp for air. 

Not wanting him to feel left out, Abby took a hold of his length and stoked it at the same time sometimes squeezing it gently. She could feel him pulsate beneath her touch. Finally they both let go of each other letting their bare, skin touch each other, creating an electric spark course between them. The heat emitted from both their bodies causing the room to burn in tune with their desire. 

Abby grinned, "Flip over again," Luka obeyed and lay on his back. She lowered her self-kissing him as she went down his body. After taking her time she reached her goal taking him into her mouth, eliciting a deep growl from Luka. She let her fingers play along the inside of his thigh as he tongue licked him up and down his erection. Finally she took him fully into her mouth rolling her tongue along the tip of his arousal. 

Luka arched up in reaction, as he grabbed her hair, running his hands though her locks, getting them entwined around his fingers. She kept moving her tongue up and down causing him to shiver and squirm underneath him. 

Luka could not take it any more; he grabbed her by her shoulders and pulled her to his mouth. They shared a deep kiss, his tongue moving along the inside of her mouth. He let his tongue lick around her body, teasing her breasts, her naval, and back up to her neck. He wrapped his legs around her body. 

"You do have something, don't you?" She whispered in his ear. 

He leaned over to the nightstand and retrieved the desired item. She unwrapped the condom and slide it over his length. Slowly she was descending upon him, feeling him inside her. He helped glide her down gently, holding onto her hips to encourage her. She rode him slowly then increased the pace, their thrusts picking up in tempo and intensity. He slide his hands over her bare back as her body devoured him. The speed increased and Luka felt himself come and let out a loud groan as Abby felt her climax, sending jolts of pleasure though her body. 

After what seemed like forever, both of them lay next to each, completely satisfied. Both breathed deeply, their energy extinguished from their lovemaking. Abby rolled over on top of Luka's chest and stared into his eyes. Nothing was said; there was no need for talk. Luka wrapped his arms around her and simply breathed and engrained this moment into his memory.