Remedy

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I really didn’t think that the name Allison suited the character at all. Don’t get me wrong I love the name Allison, but I just don’t think it fits the mood of the character. Now Romano’s niece is named Carolyn.


John obediently went his locker to fetch a light jacket. Romano stood up wordlessly. Neither was sure who should be the first person to talk. John could feel his heart racing as he removed his lab coat and put on his suit jacket. Romano stood watching his every move, analyzing his movements, trying to gauge his nervousness.

“She scares you,” Romano said, “She scares the hell out of me too. More than Kerry does.”

“Well, what ever you did really pissed her off, Dr. Romano,” John said sarcastically as he closed his locker door.

“Dr. Carter, we are on personal terms now. Whatever I did to my niece or my niece did to me, is not your business. Damn, wait until we get to Magoo’s; then you will have something good for the gossips around here. Maybe that will satisfy your curiosity,” Romano said stiffly.

The two men exited the lounge only bothering to tell several staff members where they were going. Mark seemed concerned, Chuny seemed downright frightened, and Elizabeth had tried to snag John away from Romano. They all assumed that it had something to do with Atlanta. Maybe they thought Romano was finally going to lay down his law, no matter how unjust it was.

The smell of grease and salt greeted John as he walked into Magoo’s. His stomach turned at the sight of all the food and all the strong smells that assaulted his senses. John followed Romano to the booth that Carolyn was sitting at. She was too busy staring into the depths of her coffee cup to notice the two men sit down across from her.

John tried not to stare at Carolyn, but she fascinated him. She had removed her suit jacket to reveal an iridescent blue shirt that molded to her every curve. A few strands of hair framed her tan skin; the rest fell around her shoulders and down her back.

“Robert, I’m sorry. I just was not expecting Chicago . . . your Chicago. I planned to stay in New York for a little bit longer. I wasn’t prepared to come back here, and when I saw the letter, I knew that you had pulled some strings,” Carolyn said without lifting her head.

“Carolyn, you can’t hide there forever,” Robert coaxed.

“Robert, it’s been ten years, but the idea of Chicago still makes me sick. I do not know if I can handle living here. Everyday I will have to confront the intersection where they died. I don’t think I’m strong enough to do that,” Carolyn whispered.

John felt uncomfortable being trapped in another very personal conversation, but he hesitated to get up and walk away. He wondered how Romano was blessed with such interesting family. Moreover, he wondered how someone as beautiful as Carolyn could be related to Romano.
“I’m sorry I was so rude before, Dr. Carter. You must think I’m a real beast,” Carolyn said as she slowly lifted her head and wiped away the tears that made tiny trails down her cheeks.

“Really, it’s okay. I just wanted to come see if you would stay. From what Dr. Romano told me, I understand that you are a wonderful physician’s assistant and you will be a wonderful medical student,” John said. He paused to gauge Carolyn’s reaction. He could not believe what he had just said. To him, it sounded fake, but he did want to get to know Carolyn better.

“I see Robert has already briefed you on my medical career,” Carolyn said as she smiled at John.

John could feel his palms begin to sweat. He gazed deep into her brown eyes. Little gold flecks danced about her iris lost in a sea of light chocolate brown.

“Carolyn, at least give Chicago a try,” Robert said.

“Okay, but I do come with a list of demands. One, I am Carolyn Del Amico, not Carolyn Romano. Two, my salary for shifts as a PA will match the salary I would have received at CHOP. Three, you have to treat me as you would any other staff member,” Carolyn said as she stared sternly at Romano.

Oh, Lord . . . Del Amico. John reassured himself that there had to be several hundred Del Amicos out there . . . Carolyn could not be related to her. Images of Anna flew about his mind. The resemblance was striking, but no it could not be. Anna was gone from his life. After all that had happened in the last year, he did not need elusive past loves coming back into his shattered world. He would not let Carolyn be the link back to Anna.

“That doesn’t sound too unreasonable. Dr. Carter is only on for another few hours, so he will take you to security and occupational health,” Romano said as he turned his head towards John, “Make sure she gets a medical student and PA ID badge. Take her to payroll and make sure they sign her up. Occupational health will need to fit test her and draw blood samples. Give her a tour of the ER. Dr. Carter, make sure Carolyn is already to start work next Monday.”

“Yes, sir,” John said as he stood up to let Romano leave the booth.

“Carolyn, I’ll call your cell phone when I’m done tonight. Until then, I trust Dr. Carter will keep you busy,” Romano said as he headed out the door of Doc Magoo’s.

“He scares you,” Carolyn said with a slight smirk as John said back down.

“He scares the hell out of most of the staff,” John replied nervously.

“Robert has a tendency to put people in their place. He drives a hard bargain, but deep down he tries to do what he think will be best in the end.”

“Maybe, but he doesn’t always go about it in the nicest way.”

“Was that what he was doing when I made my entrance?” Carolyn asked with a mixture of concern and confusion.

“He was disciplining me about letting a sick coworker stay at my apartment. Romano also chooses to constantly torture me about my . . . “ John said. He abruptly ended the sentence when he realized he was going to confess his drug problem to a total stranger. To John it felt only natural to open up to her, but he did not want to scare her away.

“About your . . .” Carolyn inquired, her eyebrow slightly raised.

“Nothing, really I don’t want to talk about it,” John snapped. From her expression, John could tell that she was confused and embarrassed about trying to pry.

“Why don’t we go start my grand tour of Cooke County General?” Carolyn suggested.
She stood up and reached into her purse to pay the bill. She lifted her coffee cup and placed a twenty-dollar bill underneath it. John was astonished. A cup of coffee was no more than a dollar. John smiled at her.

“I always do that. My mother waited tables when I was little. We lived off the tips. I know how hard it is to pay the rent on only ones and loose change,” Carolyn said as she straightened her blouse. She gathered her purse and suit jacket and followed John out the doors into the ambulance bay.

John smiled at her. An obviously moneyed woman talking about having to live off tips. A beautiful woman talking about confronting an intersection where she had lost friends maybe family. Carolyn seemed to be full of surprises.

* * *

“Randi, where is Dr. Carter? I really need to speak to him,” Kerry implored.

“I don’t know. He left with Romano and some blonde wearing Gucci about an hour ago,” Randi said as she smacked her bubble gum.

“If you see him, tell him to call home,” Kerry said.

Kerry placed the telephone on the receiver. She hobbled back into bed. All her thoughts were haunted by this morning’s argument. She acted so irrationally. Kerry didn’t know what triggered her reaction to Carter’s kindness and concern, but she was thoroughly humiliated by her reaction.

“Why the hell would he leave with Romano?” Kerry said aloud.

Immediately, Kerry could feel her stomach sink. He finally decided to punish Carter for having a drug problem and going to Atlanta, she thought. Her palms became drenched with sweat. Kerry had feared this day for a long time. She guessed that it would eventually happen, but she felt guilty that she could not be there to help him.

“God, please help him,” Kerry whispered as she carefully began to remove the IV line from her arm.

She walked into the bathroom and placed a bandage over the small pore that was leaking blood onto her pale skin. She turned on the shower. She hobbled back to the bedroom and collected the clothes she was wearing when she first came to see John. She returned to the bathroom.

Kerry undressed in front of the full-length mirror. She stared at the ugly scars that ran across her hip and mid-way down her thigh. They were iridescent pink and shiny. They were ugly. Kerry hated the sight of her body. She stepped underneath the water and attempted to wash the hurt and anger away.

* * *

“Randi, this is Carolyn Del Amico. She’s going to be the new medical student and PA,” John said as he leaned up against the front desk.

“I love the Gucci,” Randi said as she smacked her gum. Randi continued to sketch out different clothing designs on a notepad.

“I like that dress,” Carolyn said as she pointed to a short black halter dress Randi had sketched out.

“You do?” Randi asked slightly surprised that someone actually liked her designs. She looked at Carolyn not knowing whether to continue telling her about her designs. Randi’s gaze shifted to a very smiley Carter. Carter’s hands were obviously sweaty and his smile was a mixture of nervousness and excitement.

“I really do. Do you have a line I could buy it from? I need a dress for an upcoming charity event in New York, and that dress would be perfect.”

“No, all I have are sketches and a couple pieces I’ve made for myself,” Randi admitted as she analyzed Carolyn’s sincerity.

“Here, call this number whenever you get off tonight. I love that dress, and I hope that you will let me convince you to design that dress for me,” Carolyn said as Carter waved Mark and Deb over to where he was standing with Carolyn.

“Buy the way, Carter, Dr. Weaver has called like a million times in the last few hours,” Randi said as Carter ushered Carolyn towards Deb and Mark.

“Thanks, Randi,” John said paying very little attention to what Randi had said.

“Dr. Chen, Dr. Greene, this is Carolyn Del Amico. She will be our new medical student and physician’s assistant,” John said.

“Pleasure to meet you both,” Carolyn said politely as she extended her hand to the small Asian woman than the tall balding man.

“Carolyn . . . Del Amico?” Mark asked.

“Yes, Del Amico is my estranged father’s surname. Romano is my mother’s maiden name,” Carolyn said as she watched the tall doctor eye her from head to toe.

“I see Dr. Carter is showing you around. Have you met the rest of the staff?” Dr. Chen said as her and Dr. Greene headed towards the sound of sirens in the ambulance bay.

“Deb, have you seen Dave, Luka, or any of the nurses?” Carter called after her.

“Try the lounge. I think Dave is sleeping in exam two,” Deb said as she ran to intercept a gurney.

“I was surprised when I saw the hospital. From my experience, county hospitals are always rundown and under staffed, but County General seems different,” Carolyn remarked as she followed John to the lounge.

“Over the last year, we have become a lot closer, much like a family,” John said as he held the door open for her.

“My specialty in PA school was pediatric emergency and psychiatric medicine. I never . . .” Carolyn began.

“Carly!” Dave exclaimed.

“David!” Carolyn said as she rushed into his open arms.

John stared at Dave. Dave had his arms wrapped tightly around the blonde. His hands ran through her golden hair. His lips brushed against her tanned cheeks as he whispered something into her ear. Dave seemed unwilling to let go of her. For some reason that John could not comprehend, he felt insanely jealous of Dave.

“I guess they don’t need to be introduced,” Mark said softly as he stood next to a very shocked John who was still holding the door open.

“I guess they don’t,” John said with a tinge of jealousy hanging on each word.

“A Romano and a Del Amico, who would have guessed,” Mark said softly.

“Are you okay? Why are you back in Chicago? You look great. I can’t believe that you haven’t changed at all. How are you? You aren’t here as a patient, are you?” Dave rambled as he released Carolyn from his embrace.

“David, I’m fine. I am here as a medical student and PA. How have you been? I haven’t seen you since Brown,” Carolyn said, as she looked Dave up and down.

“Brown. Mallucci went to Brown,” Mark commented to John.

John felt his hands get clammy and his head felt heavy. He felt a wave of heat rush from his head to his toes. The room began to spin. John could feel his stomach churning. He turned to exit the lounge, which quickly became too crowded and too warm. He pushed the door open and locked the bathroom stall behind him. The contents of his stomach spilled into the porcelain bowl. He kept retching the hot liquid out of his body. Beads of sweat rolled down his face and clung to his brow.

“Carter, you okay in here?” Mark said as he knocked on stall door.

John could not even talk. The hot liquid became nothing but hot air, but he could not stop. His heart was pounding in his chest. His face was hot.

“Carter?” Mark shouted, which drew Dave and Carolyn from the lounge to the restroom. Mark was terrified. He knew how fragile Carter had become over the last year. Little things seemed to set him off. Mark resigned himself to believe that it was just the after effects of the flu, but something told him otherwise.

“Carter, open up,” Dave shouted as he tried to shake the door loose.

The noises from the stall ceased. The bathroom became dead silent for a few moments. Dave and Mark were frantic with fear. They both wondered if Carter had overdosed. They reasoned that overdose is sometimes accompanied by brief euphoria. Carolyn stared at the two men. She disappeared from the bathroom and returned a few moments later with syringe, a vile of compazine, and a small cup of water.

“Dr. Carter, unlock the door so I can give you some compazine. I brought some water for you to rinse your mouth with,” Carolyn gently coaxed as she kneeled next to the stall door.

John felt his head get heavy again. Oh, Lord. Why does this have to happen in front of her, he wondered. He could feel how drenched in sweat he was. John could taste the vomit in his mouth. His heart continued to race. He could hear Dave and Mark exchange whispers.

“John, come out. I will give you the compazine and drive you home. I’m sure Robert wouldn’t mind . . . I am positive that Robert wouldn’t mind,” Carolyn said as she lightly touched John’s ankle, which was under the stall door.

John could feel himself start to shake. He turned and turned the handle on the stall. The door slowly opened and stopped once it was resting against his side. He tried to sit up, but his attempt was too feeble. The vomiting had taken away the rest of his strength.

“Carter, can you stand up?” Mark asked. His voice was now trembling audibly.

“David, hold the door so it isn’t resting on Dr. Carter, but so there is enough room for me to get behind him and lower his body to the ground. Dr. Greene, I’ll need you to help me by gently pulling his legs toward you,” Carolyn said as she rolled up her sleeves and put her suit jacket on the countertop. She put the compazine and syringe on top of a paper toweling. She looked at the two men who both had the same pained look on their faces. Dave finally relented and held the door off John.

John closed his eyes tightly. He could feel the weight of the door removed from his body. He felt Carolyn gently cradled his shoulders and head against her chest. He felt Mark tightly grab his calves. He could feel and smell the sweat on Mark’s hands. John could smell Carolyn’s perfume. It was a light lilac.

“Dr. Greene, pull on three. One, two, three,” Carolyn said as she lifted John’s torso and pushed his toward Mark.

John could hear a loud thud. His eyes flew open to see Carolyn gingerly rubbing her forehead. His vision was severely blurred but he could see her grimace each time her hand touched her forehead. He felt her arms cradle him again as the door swung open.

The door creaked loudly. John felt a strange sense of terror sweep over him. The fear consumed him. The door to exam three creaked loudly. He opened his mouth to cry out, but he could not. The words did not come in exam three. He could smell lilac and hairspray. Lucy smelt like strong, angry hairspray in exam three. Waves of nausea overtook his body, as six hands attempted to secure him on his side. One hand gently rubbed circles on his back as his stomach emptied.

“Dave, go get a back board. See if Malik can come help,” Mark ordered. His voice was even shakier. Carolyn could see the intense fear in his eyes. She knew there was something that no one would tell her. John described the staff with verbal unease, as if they were hiding a horrible secret.

“Carolyn, get a pulse of respirations on him,” Mark said.

“124 beats per minute and 24 respirations per minute. John, have you taken any prescription or over-the-counter drugs this afternoon?” Carolyn asked. She could see that Dr. Greene was relieved that she was taking control of the situation.

John shook his head. “No, no drugs.”

“John, we’re going to put you on a gurney. Have you eaten anything this afternoon?”

“No, nothing.”

John could feel the cold plastic against his skin. Carolyn, Dave, Mark, and Malik carried John into exam three. His body tensed and he could feel the waves of nausea ebbing at his throat.

“Dave and Malik, stay with Carolyn. Let her run it,” Mark said softly as he left the room.

“Dave, how does his chest sound? Malik, could you please get 3 of compazine and a wet towel?” Carolyn said, as she slowly unbuttoned Johns dress shirt.

“Lungs have crackles bilaterally mid way from the base,” Dave said as he rolled John back onto his back.

“How about a portable? I don’t want anyone else in this room, okay?” Carolyn said sternly to Dave.

Dave walked across the room to the telephone. John could hear him mumbling something about getting films taken and processed stat. John’s eyes began to focus on Carolyn, who was now drawing blood from his arm. John couldn’t feel the sting of the needle or the pressure of her hands on his arm.

“Hey, you didn’t tell me that my tour would be interactive,” Carolyn said as she removed the needle and whisked a few stray strand of hair off his forehead. John managed a small smile.

Malik passed her the syringe of compazine. Carolyn gently rolled up his sleeve and swabbed his upper arm with an alcohol wipe. John could feel the coolness on his skin. Carolyn pushed the needle into his skin and pushed the fluid into his arm. John could feel the warmth in his arm.

“Malik, can you get me a chem 7, complete CBC, viral load, and tox screen,” Carolyn said quietly to Malik, who scribbled the information on John’s chart.

John could feel the tears stinging his eyes. He knew Carolyn could see them too. Dave was still arguing with radiology about how fast someone could get here. He could here the strokes of the pen as Malik scribbled on the chart. Carolyn’s hand lightly traced circles on his arm as tears streamed down his face.

“Dave, go to radiology and get the damn portable. Malik, go call in the labs,” Carolyn said. The two men scattered.

“Thanks,” John whispered.

“What happened, John? Your labs are going to come back inconclusive . . . except for a slight viral load, which is presumably Asian flu. I think the diagnosis is something more than somatic,” Carolyn said as she pulled a chair next to John’s bed.

John could feel the tears come harder and hotter. They burned him. They stung his eyes and his cheeks.

“Lucy,” John whispered.

“Tell me, John. I want to help you,” Carolyn whispered.

“I killed her,” John said, “I left her alone. He stabbed her and let her bleed to death. I never checked on her.”

Carolyn was taken aback by John’s statement. His eyes became vacant and dull. She ran her hand across his cheek to wipe the tears off his face. He closed his eyes and sighed deeply.

“Who was Lucy, John?”

“My medical student. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“What are you going to throw up every time the thought of her enters your mind?”

“No, it’s just complicated. You look like Anna, you are as sensitive as Lucy . . .you remind me of them,” John shouted at her.

“You are talking about my half-sister, Anna, aren’t you? Anna reassured me that I would love County General just as much as she did. She told me about you. Anna is only starting to realize the mistakes in her life, and she names not being with you as one of her biggest mistakes,” Carolyn said softly. She wanted to explain everything to John. Anna had told her about John, and how she had hurt him. Anna voiced her concerns that John might resent me for what Anna had done.

“Is Anna okay?”

“No, Anna’s not okay. She has married to Max. They have a beautiful little boy, Alec. He comes to visit me every time they decide to enter rehab together,” Carolyn said as she sighed and leaned back into the chair.

“Why is she in rehab?”

“Max got her addicted again. Cocaine this time. She was clean during the pregnancy. I wanted to move to Philly to help take care of Alec,” Carolyn said.

Her eyes drifted to the floor. John could see the sadness etched in her eyes. It was a sadness that he recognized. It was the one that he woke up to every morning.

“Is that why you didn’t want to stay in Chicago?”

“Yes and no. I grew up in Chicago with my mom and her husband. They died when I was fourteen. I lived with Robert until I was old enough to leave for college. Since then, I’ve either been at school or New York where most of my family is.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why you weren’t driving the semi that rammed them into the median divider?”

“I was just trying to be compassionate,” John snapped at her.

“You cannot assume guilt for everyone else’s problems. Your syntax, John. Next time, maybe try saying ‘that’s so horrible.’ Talking the way you do, will only help your feelings about Anna and Lucy live on.”



Part 5
Fanfiction Home