ER/Stand Crossover
It was way too early to be awake, Dave thought irritably as
he threw back his covers and got out of bed. It was only five in
the morning. It wasn't even really sunrise yet. It was that pre-
dawn time, just before the sun started to rise. He liked it, in a
way. God knows it wasn't like he got to see that time of the day
all that often in the past, but that summer he had discovered
within himself a real appreciation for the quiet time just before
the morning began. Maybe I could make some coffee, he thought
cheerily as he dressed, and snag some of those muffins from
yesterday.
He was worn out from the day before. He had spent all day
and most of the evening checking out the nearby towns to see if
Doug had holed himself up there. It was the right thing to do, to
look, even though it was probably a task in futility. Doug was
off to the west and it made him sad, but he was glad he was
detailed with searching the closer towns. It wasn't like he
really knew Doug anyway. It had been only five days since he met
the man. It was hard to get worked up over someone he hardly
knew.
No, he thought as he quietly walked down the stairwell,
that's not true. It felt wrong. Doug, at first and second glance,
certainly seemed like a candidate for Flagg's empire. Underneath
it though, Dave sensed that Doug was merely flailing in deep
water, not able to keep his head up. It made it doubly sad, since
Doug's flaws were mostly bad choices, not an evil streak a mile
wide. Dave had looked as hard as he could, hoping to prevent the
older man from doing something stupid. He hoped Carter and Luka
had better luck, and that was the truth.
There was already coffee waiting in the old fashioned
percolator. He was surprised but only slightly surprised. Randi
was probably fast asleep, but it wouldn't surprise him if Jeanie
or Kerry were up and about. Jeanie was worried about Luka. She
hadn't wanted him to go at all, he had seen that in her eyes. She
understood, of course, but that didn't make it easier. Kerry was
worried too, but about who exactly he was sure. He knew she was
worried about Doug and Lucy, but he also sensed an uneasy fear on
her part. About what, he didn't know. Sometimes he wasn't sure
that he wanted to know. In a lot of ways he knew this group of
people far too well already and a part of him kept expecting the
live studio audience of their lives to start hooting " Jerry!
Jerry!"
He chuckled to himself as he poured his cup of coffee. Its
not quite that bad, he decided. There's just too many troubles
souls in the group. They need to liven up. He walked out of the
kitchen, already starting to plot what he needed to do to bring a
few smiles to the faces of his compatriots. No snakes popping out
of cans of nuts, he thought as he opened the french doors leading
to the porch, everyone has bad nerves. I don't want to get shot
again.
" Dave, you're up. You're up really early." Kerry waved him
over to the wicker table she was sitting at. I was right, he
thought as he spied the cup of coffee in her hands and the dark
circles under her eyes, I don't think she even went to bed.
" You don't look like you even went to bed, chief." He
didn't mean it in a bad way, but he saw a tell tale sparkle of
anger flash in her eyes. He didn't let that stop him from smiling
though. *He* hadn't spent all summer watching her every move,
analyzing her habits for clues to an impending breakdown, so he
didn't deserve her wrath and had no intention of putting up with
it.
After a moment, her anger faded. She shrugged, and sipped
her coffee. " I couldn't sleep. I was worried. Despite what you
all think, I wasn't trying to get Lucy killed. I happen to like
Lucy. And for the record, I like Doug enough to not be ok with
letting him destroy himself."
" You love him," Dave said. He held up his hand, cutting off
her startled protest. " I don't mean you want to marry him or
anything like that. Its just.... You two have a really warped
relationship. You both have a lot invested in being nasty to each
other but when the chips are down, you would jump to each other's
defense. Do you know Doug almost shot me that night we first met?
He was going to kill me... because he thought I was hurting you.
People don't act that way over people they don't care about."
Dave almost smirked at the end of his analysis. He was right, he
knew that, right down to the fact that it would never go any
farther than it had the night before. He wondered if Kerry
realized that his bedroom was directly over the porch and that he
hadn't been able to sleep the night before. Certainly, somebody
had done the wild thing on the porch last night, and Dave didn't
think Carter and Randi had devised some weird fantasy where they
called each other " Doug " and " Kerry ".
The important thing was that he thought he knew what it was.
A physical thing that happened between two friends, not destined
to be repeated, not even something they could speak comfortably
about without giving up their long standing cherished "hatred".
They enjoyed their dislike. It was immature, it was the
equivalent of two little toddlers pulling each other's hair in a
desperate attempt to prove how much they disliked each other, but
all the while secretly wanting the other as a friend. There was
nothing to be threatened with there. In fact, he had told
himself, there was no way they could be together on a full time
basis. They had too much invested in standing at opposite ends.
Kerry eyed him. She was clearly pondering his words. He
thought it was funny that someone who seemed so together didn't
seem to have enough self awareness to see why she was acting the
way she was. Finally she said, " I suppose, in a way, you might
be right. In maybe a brother/sister way. We get a little too
angry with each other for anything more. But that's not why I
sent Lucy after him. I would have done that if any one of you had
taken off like that. It just happened to be Doug this time. I
don't think I could live with myself if one of you was that upset
and made such a bad decision and I didn't try to stop it. And
trust me, I'm worried about Lucy and I care about Lucy but I
think everyone has been assuming that she's completely incapable.
I don't think its the case and I don't want her thinking that."
Despite her forceful words, Dave caught her underlying worry.
Kerry was going to feel very guilty indeed if anything did happen
to Lucy.
As it happened, he agreed with Kerry on a few points. He
believed that it didn't matter who had left. If she had been
able, Kerry would have gone after Doug herself, and she would
have done the same for any of them. He also didn't think that
Lucy was completely incapable of being by herself. Lucy was a
rational person. If nothing else, her experience with the bikers
was just going to make her a lot more suspicious of strangers.
That wasn't a bad thing. " She'll be fine. So will Doug." As he
said it, he knew it was true. There was something coming, he
could feel that, but he had no doubt suddenly that everyone was,
at that moment, just fine. He didn't know how he knew, but he
did, and he trusted the feeling.
Kerry sipped her coffee again. She felt it too, he realized,
but she didn't trust the feeling and it was eating her up with
worry. " I'm really more worried about Carter and Luka," she said
after a moment. She smiled slightly. " I think Jeanie and Randi
will kill me if anything happens to them."
And that thought wasn't very far from the truth, Dave
realized. Jeanie had been pretty pissed off about Luka going and
he knew more than a few harsh words had been exchanged between
Kerry and Jeanie. It was made worse by the fact that Jeanie had
started coughing and sniffling that evening. He felt bad for her.
The drug cocktail was going to lose potency over time. She was
going to die in a slow painful fashion and she knew it. He was
surprised at how cheerful she generally was.
Randi was a different story. She wasn't pissed at Kerry, no.
She was pissed at Carter for running off on a fool's errand. She
had actually called it a fool's errand. In a lot of ways, it
disappointed Dave to know that she was quite thoroughly attached
to Carter, because she intrigued him on a number of levels, and
they had a common background. In a different situation, a
different world, he would have made some moves on her. He had a
few too many scruples for that though, and he was worried about a
number of things. Getting to Boulder was one of them. It was the
third of September, in a place known for early snow storms. There
was a chance, a good chance, that they might get snowed in for
the winter and he didn't need to add to the potential cabin fever
by horning in.
Finally he said, " I think they'll get over it. I'm sure
Carter and Luka are both fine. You know, chief, you worry too
much. You're going to give yourself a heart attack if you don't
let go of some of the stress. " Again, she started glaring at him
as if it was none of his business but for once he decided to
stand his ground. She was a burbling mass of repressed emotions
and even a self admitted insensitive clod like himself could see
it. " It's not like we have any rat race to worry about now. Kick
back and enjoy the ride. It's not healthy being so tense."
After a moment, her angry look faded. No doubt she realized
his words weren't some sort of slam on her mental status. Even
Jeanie had taken a few shots the day before, very
uncharacteristic for the young black woman. He suspected Kerry
was feeling more than a little sensitive and it wasn't going to
be long before someone's well aimed barb was hurled back at them
at light speed. He just wanted to prevent it, or at least not be
the poor sucker directly in the line of fire. Kerry looked into
her cup, obviously thinking hard. " You know, " she said after a
long moment, " I miss having things to do. I was thinking about
it all night. I had things to do all of the time. I didn't have
time to do anything but work and I liked it because I didn't have
to think. Now... it seems like the only activity I have." She
sighed. " I have too much to think about."
" You need a hobby." Dave said. " Aside from cooking and
killing things." He smirked at her. Not only did she need a
hobby, she needed to lighten up. " We'll go into town today and
get you some yarn and knitting needles. I need mittens and maybe
a matching scarf."
She rolled her eyes. " I don't think so."
" Hey, I know how to knit. " That got her to smile, so he
considered it a win. " My mother taught me to knit. You shouldn't
knock it. It's very relaxing. Seriously though, you can find
something to do other than get yourself depressed. You're right
that we have a lot of time on our hands. Maybe you should try
something new. You've got plenty of time and we certainly don't
have to pay for anything. I was thinking of trying one of those
big ship models with all the riggings and sails. You know, the
kind that costs like five hundred dollars." He leaned back in his
chair. " I know this sounds kind of bad, but it's kind of nice to
be able to have stuff. I wasn't exactly raised in Carter style
opulence."
" Well, join the club." She sipped her coffee again. " I
lived on those cheap packages of noodles for years. You know, the
plus side to this whole plague business is that I'm no longer
over one hundred thousand dollars in debt. Tell me, just how much
does a medical degree from the University of Grenada cost? A
handful of shiny beads? Some American pornography?"
" I paid in sexual favors." Dave grinned.
Kerry grinned back. " It's not every man that is secure
enough with themselves to admit to getting through school on
their knees."
" I was the favorite of all the female professors." They
both started laughing at the same moment.

Part 41
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